A RENEWED FAITH TO TRUST AND BELIEVE

“So faith comes from hearing, and hearing through the word of Christ.” – Romans 10:17

Like the grinding of corn on a millstone, my mustard seed of faith was just grounded to dust.  I had nothing left in my storehouse to believe and trust in. My faith was gone. Completely depleted.  

That was the day I stood before a public defense attorney informing me that my daughter was looking at twenty years in prison. I nearly collapsed on the granite floors in the Hallways of Justice.  She was three days away from being an adult.

To make matters more hopeless, we were about to lose our home in twenty-three days with nowhere to go and no money in the bank. How could I even attempt to help my daughter now? 

Where are you Lord?  Don’t you care about us? How can I stand in faith when all I have received is pain, hurt, discouragement, and unanswered prayers?” I asked.  

Running on empty, I was too exhausted to pray to God.  Lack of sleep and no appetite, what could I honestly say? I was upset, angry, and worried.  Ten years of crises finally came to a head.

Part of the problem was the fact that my faith failed due to my own disobedience.  I had slowly walked away from my belief and trust in God that He could heal my own daughter.  Instead, I took control to fix my daughter, leaving God out. 

Through the years and holidays, discouragement ruled my emotions and squashed my prayer life; my personal connection with Jesus.  However, there comes a time in which you hit a brick wall and wake up to realize that your way doesn’t work anymore and you need God! Pronto!  

Prior to that fateful day in the courthouse, my husband confessed to our own failings as parents. We started to pray every morning for God to save our broken daughter, AT ANY COST from her destructive choices. Despite my fading hope, it was one last plea with God to hear us.

That day in court, God renewed my trust to believe in Him. Yes, we were faced with the knowledge that our daughter could go to jail for twenty years. Thankfully, God had something else in mind. His answer came in the form of a new mortgage at the last minute and money to hire a private attorney.

Ten months later, our daughter was home with her records sealed for life. During those months, especially through the Christmas season, our entire family began to heal and understand what it means to trust and have faith in Him through the most difficult of times.

My favorite verse is Psalm 116:1-2. It says, I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me, I will call on him as long as I live.”

By Stacy Lee Flury, Hurting Mom