“To let go is not to deny,
But to accept”
As long as we are in denial about the fact that we have no control over our child, we will not be able to let go. It is not that we must accept what they are doing or not doing, but we do need to accept the fact that we are powerless over their actions. It is only when we begin to face that they are making their own choices and that we can’t fix them that we can start letting go.
Being a mom is such an important part of who we are that releasing our children seems impossible. It feels like such an incredible and painful loss. But, letting go doesn’t mean that we don’t love our child or even that we can’t have a relationship with them. What it does mean is that we trust God more and rely less on what our child is doing or not doing for our sense of well-being. We give our child the independence they need so they can be motivated by God instead of by our nagging, meddling or manipulation. We become free from the emotional roller-coaster ride, because our emotional state is no longer reliant on our child’s actions.
If our child is going to turn around, it is not going to be because of anything we do. It’s going to be because we get out of the way and allow God to do what He wants to do.